adsum | npc contact.1

Huh? Come on, you shouldn't bully Lily May, and act like you don't know her name...

( he looks at rokkun, ending his question with an answer that they both go together. don't look at komaeda like this, he's going to be disappointed if even rokkun doesn't know her name... and komaeda's going to watch her tail because she's so cute... and fluffy, how is she so talented? )

You lack talent. ( what he does have is hope, and that's more than enough to keep komaeda by his side with little to few problems. as for the knife, it's not like komaeda can help the change in his attitude, but he doesn't see anything wrong about it when he does act that way. )

But I am considerate of your hope, is that something you dislike? ( now he's looking rokkun in the eyes wearing an expression that's curios if he's done something wrong. )

I'm just wondering why it has to be one or the other. I'm the captain of the soccer team— I might not be the best in the world, but I'm better than everybody else here.

[ He ??? pulls a wooden sauce spoon out of his pocket and taps Komaeda on the tip of the nose with it, like he's making a point, and he's not even going to wash it it goes back into his pocket. ]

Does talent have to be a competition between everybody everywhere? As a student, the world is the school, you know.

[ His hope is confidence, it's grit, it's the all-or-nothing of "graduate or perish" that all high school seniors should have. ]

Edited 2021-05-18 05:20 (UTC)

( with a claim like that, komaeda's unable to look away from him as if he's trying to understand what was said. what did he just say? it's almost hilarious, komaeda thinks, as he wonders who the group of "everybody else" actually is. how much credit is he giving himself when he's in a completely different ranking than let's say... an ultimate. )

...Hm. ( he sighs, shaking his head while he tries to find a response. even with the sauce spoon touching the tip of his nose, his eyes remained trained on the other as he proves to be unbothered. honestly, he's just used to unfortunate things happening to him. ) What makes you think you're better than an Ultimate? ( once again, he doesn't sound too impressed. ) To compare yourself to a "symbol of hope," you really have lost your mind.

( is this what rokkun meant when komaeda wasn't considerate of him? )

Talent defines your hope, and the ones who have it are filled with it to the brim overflowing... the mere thought of it makes my heart skip a beat.

( he looks a little flushed as he thinks about it, but his gaze is back on rokkun despite the giddy expression. )

When you graduate, this place will no longer be your world, and then what...?

Then I'm going to university to become an architect. But until then, I'm a student of this school. Send your "ultimates" to the soccer field and watch as I beat their asses.

[ Outside, that's his playing field. Ultimate Hope? Ultimate Detective? They're Ultimate Nothings against him in his domain. ]

( oh, i hate it, like any of them bitches are going to play on the soccer field. but can i say him as an architect is so cute... ultimate architect let's goooooo. )

For what reason? They're already better than you.

( he's not saying this to be mean, but he just thinks of them very highly. besides, they can't even go outside, now he's just playing unfair. )

Are you going to go against their talents as well? ...Yeah, that sounds fun. Want to test your luck?

( what's he trying to prove??? )

[ Ultimate Architect let's go... It's why he's in the art club even though he doesn't paint, the hidden Rokkun lore.

Anyways, who's being unfair? Soccer is totally equal opportunity. Anybody with legs can kick. ]

Hah... If they're better than me, I'm going to have to recruit them into my team. Think you can get them to play me?

( nooooo the development we love to see it, he's going to be the best, and then when komaeda hears about him on the new he can't finally appreciate knowing him. please... i want to see him hit rocks, let komaeda watch him hit rocks!! )

No. ( :) ) What have you done that's worthy to warrant their hope on your team?

( okay, also none of them will even listen to him, they think he's insane? come on rokkun, you know no one likes komaeda. )

Being beside trash like me doesn't help.

That's true.

[ which one—

But he nods like yeah, he's not put off by not having so called ultimates on his team, because his team doesn't operate on hope anyways. Who needs hope when you're badass? Only weaklings need hope. ]

Then why stay?

( he asks, about the latter of course, considering it's a no brainer he shouldn't be around the ultimates himself — in the future when he becomes the ultimate architect? he can do whatever he wants. )

You're losing out on a lot being around me. ( his words come out slow, yet thoughtful as he looks forward without glancing in rokkun's direction. if he didn't bring komaeda along, then he wouldn't have to ask why is he so inconsiderate around him and his friends, he also wouldn't have to deal with such odd behavior. ) Since you're better than everyone here... don't you deserve better?

( why is komaeda asking this? what is he up to? )

[ ? Rokkun tilts his head, as if letting his brain slosh around in his skull will wake up the sleeping brain cells needed to understand what Komaeda is asking. Why be around Komaeda when it's a detriment to every aspect of his life? ... ]

I guess... it's because of our time together. You weren't always who you are, and I wasn't always who I am, but you've always been there. Not necessarily there for me, but... there.

I guess you can say it's because I'm fond of you.

( slushy head.

not necessarily there for him is an odd way to describe it, if komaeda remembers correctly, apparently he was kinder in the memories he's shared with some people. he doesn't think so, but he's not even sure if he can compare those memories with rokkun, it's just all too confusing for him. )

...Rokkun, remember when I didn't know what to promise. ( awhile back on his birthday, komaeda never really thought of something proper, and maybe... ) Maybe it's this... to not say these things... because...

( good and bad luck works hard on komaeda, if he accepts this as a stroke of good luck, something bad will happen. if he continues to pursue bad luck, then maybe at the end he'll have something nice. even if it makes his stomach flip in excitement, there's this genuine concern mixed with it. if he accepts it... something will happen to rokkun. if he accepts it... komaeda knows he loses what's around him in return, and if that's the case...

hope is about friendships, and bonds with other, but even trash like him knows he isn't worthy to obtain that. even this companionship or whatever they make of it, it's best if he doesn't have this either because... it's what he's used to, he'll lose him, and what's the point of thinking he has this when it'll easily leave from his grasp. )

Ah, I'm sorry for bothering you, Rokkun, please don't be fond of a mistake like me. You're better than that.

[ He's going to lose Rokkun anyways, with his goal being to either graduate by the end of the year or die trying, so that's all the time they're going to have left together no matter what. Or maybe even less, if Komaeda's dementia eats away at his brain and he forgets... Rokkun would be the one to lose him, then, and the thought makes him breathe out and step closer to Komaeda, reaching out to cup his cheek in his hand. ]

Even great men have their vices. Am I not allowed one? Besides, it's hard not to be fond when you're you.

( all's lost in the end, and this is why komaeda doesn't think of latching onto these emotions of his. rokkun, everyone else that he knows will follow the same path, and the ultimate should be aware nothing different will happen. if he doesn't die by his luck, then he'll leave him by some other means so it's a good thing that komaeda's heart is in the right place. hope, hope would never leave him.

he leans his head into rokkun's hand, and with a soft laugh. )

You're a pathetic idiot, but I couldn't expect you to be anything else. ( at least that comes out rather sweet of him? he only allows the other to cup his face for so long until komaeda takes a step back. ) ... ( though, he still knows how his luck works, and besides, if rokkun's friends are outside; komaeda already knows he's unable to go out there. )

Are you meeting them outside? It must be pretty cool out...

[ A pathetic idiot... yeah he is ]

Cool? I guess it can get a bit breezy sometimes, but not so much that I'd need my jacket back.

[ That he is going to get back someday, right? ]

I wish you could come, but with your health and all...

( stop, it's resting around the log... why are you trying to strip it of its clothes? )

I thought you'd forget I'd even have it, ah... nothing gets past you, does it?

( he chuckles softly, breathing in as his eyes lift to look at him. when did komaeda tell him all of that? well, people can just tell by looking at him that his health isn't the best. he wouldn't be surprised if the other knew of what he was going through. )

...Sigh. ( he's doing it on purpose, a little dramatic as he raises his hands to his temples. ) I can go with you outside.

Yeah?

[ He perks up a little at the thought of being able to take Komaeda out. ]

Will you watch me as I destroy my enemies? I want you to have eyes for only me.

( rokkun may be perking up, but that should easily be dismissed as komaeda begins to pull at his jacket's sleeve, pulling his arm out of it as he does with the other. once he's officially pulled it off, he holds it out for the other to take. )

Here, maybe if you take this with you... it's like I'm there.

( everyone knows that the outside isn't open for transfers, but leave it to komaeda, he'll figure something out. it starts with the janitor because he has keys... that's what he thinks. )

After you're done, you know my class, or you can leave it in my locker.

[ JACKET SWAP

Rokkun puts it on Immediately. ]

Are you going to need this back by tomorrow? I'll get sweat and blood on it.

[ And laundry day is two weeks away ]

It doesn't matter.

( it's his signature, but he's willing to hand it over so rokkun can wear it, and he does have another jacket that he's able to put on the meantime. looking him over, komaeda stares at how the jacket sits perfectly on his shoulders, and the tail of it doesn't run against the floor. before he can allow him to comfortably part with it, the ultimate starts digging into the pockets of his jacket, pulling out a few items here and there: his pda, switchblade, chisel, cat treats, note, and a pocket tissue. he has no place to put all of this, so he decides to grab at the hem of his shirt, holding it out so he can drop them in the lower area to carry it like that. )

When it comes to your blood and sweat, have I ever complained...? And when we see each other again... ( he breathes in, looking off to the side. ) ...you can give it back.

Hm? It wouldn't be my blood.

[ But... oh... goodbye all those potentially useful things, he really could have used that switchblade and chisel and tissue. ]

( listen, if he's looking at one of them, komaeda doesn't mind offering the chisel, because it's helped him out so far... and his first weapon so it's special. )

Hm...? Why do you are about that, if it's someone else... it's fine. I've dealt with it before.

( he has no qualms about it, but if rokkun needs reassurance. ) Do you want my blood on it first?

[ Does having Komaeda's blood on it first help in any way? Like it's already soiled so any more blood won't matter. ]

...Yeah. Could you?

[ He holds the jacket back out. ]

( he sets his stuff down on the ground, looking through what he has that would do the job. it's simple really, the easiest way would probably be eating something bad so he could throw up blood since that's happened to him, but without anything to do that. he can only respond with the switchblade as he exposes the blade while standing up, opening the palm of his other hand, he starts to cut along the width of it. he hardly flinches, appearing to be numb to the pain, but blood does bubble up in the center from his action. it's sensitive, and there's a burning sensation that makes him not want to close his hand much. he makes sure not to let any drop, and he looks at the other with his palm up and over the jacket. )

How much of myself... do you need?

[ tf Komaeda would cut his hand to smear blood over his jacker for no good reason but he won't blood oath with Rokkun?? It takes a lot not to reach out and take that hand in his, so he's forced to clasp his in front of his lap, allowing Komaeda to do his thing. ]

I want all of you. Would that be too much to ask?

( jealous of the jacket, huh? i mean, look at it... it IS designer... the blood in his hand continues to pool, and he turns it to the side so that a few drops happen to drizzle on the fabric of his attire. one drop after the other, doing nothing but leaving behind wet stains on his already worn outfit. he doesn't spill it all, rather, he's trying to fold his hand slightly to see if more will come up. )

Hm...? Do you have enough hope to use me correctly...

( the thing about komaeda is that he wants to be used, serve a purpose for hope, and he's never thought of allowing someone who lacks talent that ability to do so. even now, he's looking at the other trying to read his expressions, and see what he wants. )

When I asked for you on my birthday, you rejected me... remember?

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