adsum | npc contact.1

That's true.

[ which one—

But he nods like yeah, he's not put off by not having so called ultimates on his team, because his team doesn't operate on hope anyways. Who needs hope when you're badass? Only weaklings need hope. ]

Then why stay?

( he asks, about the latter of course, considering it's a no brainer he shouldn't be around the ultimates himself — in the future when he becomes the ultimate architect? he can do whatever he wants. )

You're losing out on a lot being around me. ( his words come out slow, yet thoughtful as he looks forward without glancing in rokkun's direction. if he didn't bring komaeda along, then he wouldn't have to ask why is he so inconsiderate around him and his friends, he also wouldn't have to deal with such odd behavior. ) Since you're better than everyone here... don't you deserve better?

( why is komaeda asking this? what is he up to? )

[ ? Rokkun tilts his head, as if letting his brain slosh around in his skull will wake up the sleeping brain cells needed to understand what Komaeda is asking. Why be around Komaeda when it's a detriment to every aspect of his life? ... ]

I guess... it's because of our time together. You weren't always who you are, and I wasn't always who I am, but you've always been there. Not necessarily there for me, but... there.

I guess you can say it's because I'm fond of you.

( slushy head.

not necessarily there for him is an odd way to describe it, if komaeda remembers correctly, apparently he was kinder in the memories he's shared with some people. he doesn't think so, but he's not even sure if he can compare those memories with rokkun, it's just all too confusing for him. )

...Rokkun, remember when I didn't know what to promise. ( awhile back on his birthday, komaeda never really thought of something proper, and maybe... ) Maybe it's this... to not say these things... because...

( good and bad luck works hard on komaeda, if he accepts this as a stroke of good luck, something bad will happen. if he continues to pursue bad luck, then maybe at the end he'll have something nice. even if it makes his stomach flip in excitement, there's this genuine concern mixed with it. if he accepts it... something will happen to rokkun. if he accepts it... komaeda knows he loses what's around him in return, and if that's the case...

hope is about friendships, and bonds with other, but even trash like him knows he isn't worthy to obtain that. even this companionship or whatever they make of it, it's best if he doesn't have this either because... it's what he's used to, he'll lose him, and what's the point of thinking he has this when it'll easily leave from his grasp. )

Ah, I'm sorry for bothering you, Rokkun, please don't be fond of a mistake like me. You're better than that.

[ He's going to lose Rokkun anyways, with his goal being to either graduate by the end of the year or die trying, so that's all the time they're going to have left together no matter what. Or maybe even less, if Komaeda's dementia eats away at his brain and he forgets... Rokkun would be the one to lose him, then, and the thought makes him breathe out and step closer to Komaeda, reaching out to cup his cheek in his hand. ]

Even great men have their vices. Am I not allowed one? Besides, it's hard not to be fond when you're you.

( all's lost in the end, and this is why komaeda doesn't think of latching onto these emotions of his. rokkun, everyone else that he knows will follow the same path, and the ultimate should be aware nothing different will happen. if he doesn't die by his luck, then he'll leave him by some other means so it's a good thing that komaeda's heart is in the right place. hope, hope would never leave him.

he leans his head into rokkun's hand, and with a soft laugh. )

You're a pathetic idiot, but I couldn't expect you to be anything else. ( at least that comes out rather sweet of him? he only allows the other to cup his face for so long until komaeda takes a step back. ) ... ( though, he still knows how his luck works, and besides, if rokkun's friends are outside; komaeda already knows he's unable to go out there. )

Are you meeting them outside? It must be pretty cool out...

[ A pathetic idiot... yeah he is ]

Cool? I guess it can get a bit breezy sometimes, but not so much that I'd need my jacket back.

[ That he is going to get back someday, right? ]

I wish you could come, but with your health and all...

( stop, it's resting around the log... why are you trying to strip it of its clothes? )

I thought you'd forget I'd even have it, ah... nothing gets past you, does it?

( he chuckles softly, breathing in as his eyes lift to look at him. when did komaeda tell him all of that? well, people can just tell by looking at him that his health isn't the best. he wouldn't be surprised if the other knew of what he was going through. )

...Sigh. ( he's doing it on purpose, a little dramatic as he raises his hands to his temples. ) I can go with you outside.

Yeah?

[ He perks up a little at the thought of being able to take Komaeda out. ]

Will you watch me as I destroy my enemies? I want you to have eyes for only me.

( rokkun may be perking up, but that should easily be dismissed as komaeda begins to pull at his jacket's sleeve, pulling his arm out of it as he does with the other. once he's officially pulled it off, he holds it out for the other to take. )

Here, maybe if you take this with you... it's like I'm there.

( everyone knows that the outside isn't open for transfers, but leave it to komaeda, he'll figure something out. it starts with the janitor because he has keys... that's what he thinks. )

After you're done, you know my class, or you can leave it in my locker.

[ JACKET SWAP

Rokkun puts it on Immediately. ]

Are you going to need this back by tomorrow? I'll get sweat and blood on it.

[ And laundry day is two weeks away ]

It doesn't matter.

( it's his signature, but he's willing to hand it over so rokkun can wear it, and he does have another jacket that he's able to put on the meantime. looking him over, komaeda stares at how the jacket sits perfectly on his shoulders, and the tail of it doesn't run against the floor. before he can allow him to comfortably part with it, the ultimate starts digging into the pockets of his jacket, pulling out a few items here and there: his pda, switchblade, chisel, cat treats, note, and a pocket tissue. he has no place to put all of this, so he decides to grab at the hem of his shirt, holding it out so he can drop them in the lower area to carry it like that. )

When it comes to your blood and sweat, have I ever complained...? And when we see each other again... ( he breathes in, looking off to the side. ) ...you can give it back.

Hm? It wouldn't be my blood.

[ But... oh... goodbye all those potentially useful things, he really could have used that switchblade and chisel and tissue. ]

( listen, if he's looking at one of them, komaeda doesn't mind offering the chisel, because it's helped him out so far... and his first weapon so it's special. )

Hm...? Why do you are about that, if it's someone else... it's fine. I've dealt with it before.

( he has no qualms about it, but if rokkun needs reassurance. ) Do you want my blood on it first?

[ Does having Komaeda's blood on it first help in any way? Like it's already soiled so any more blood won't matter. ]

...Yeah. Could you?

[ He holds the jacket back out. ]

( he sets his stuff down on the ground, looking through what he has that would do the job. it's simple really, the easiest way would probably be eating something bad so he could throw up blood since that's happened to him, but without anything to do that. he can only respond with the switchblade as he exposes the blade while standing up, opening the palm of his other hand, he starts to cut along the width of it. he hardly flinches, appearing to be numb to the pain, but blood does bubble up in the center from his action. it's sensitive, and there's a burning sensation that makes him not want to close his hand much. he makes sure not to let any drop, and he looks at the other with his palm up and over the jacket. )

How much of myself... do you need?

[ tf Komaeda would cut his hand to smear blood over his jacker for no good reason but he won't blood oath with Rokkun?? It takes a lot not to reach out and take that hand in his, so he's forced to clasp his in front of his lap, allowing Komaeda to do his thing. ]

I want all of you. Would that be too much to ask?

( jealous of the jacket, huh? i mean, look at it... it IS designer... the blood in his hand continues to pool, and he turns it to the side so that a few drops happen to drizzle on the fabric of his attire. one drop after the other, doing nothing but leaving behind wet stains on his already worn outfit. he doesn't spill it all, rather, he's trying to fold his hand slightly to see if more will come up. )

Hm...? Do you have enough hope to use me correctly...

( the thing about komaeda is that he wants to be used, serve a purpose for hope, and he's never thought of allowing someone who lacks talent that ability to do so. even now, he's looking at the other trying to read his expressions, and see what he wants. )

When I asked for you on my birthday, you rejected me... remember?

[ It's a nice jacket, I would wear it. ]

Did I? When you're the one always rejecting me? Remind me...

[ Remind me, while I pull up that thread going ??? bc all my selective memory remembers is Komaeda threatening to slit his throat. MY BIRTHDAY THREAD TRAUMA ]

( okay, but you'd have to wear komaeda's clown shoes with it. would you? )

Just so you can reject me again? ...Or is this your way of saying you want to agree?

( i'm tearing up, i had to go find it myself because i was like i know komaeda said some insane shit at him like that. THEY WERE BONDING ON HIS BIRTHDAY?

even now, they're bonding as he holds his hand out to him, so he can get some of komaeda's blood and smear it on the jacket. )

[ I went to look it up and are those double zipper shoes wtf. and was that bonding?? is this bonding??? insane

He takes Komaeda's hand and licks the blood off his palm as his nonanswer. This is what I was going to have him do if Komaeda had blood oathed him the last two times Rokkun tried to get him to, but now he can. ]

( yeah... and those most have been the best shoes in his era where he's like "i want to zip up not just three times, but five!" now you can too, as long as you have jeans with the zipper. ok, idk what their bonding looks like, it just feels like as long as they feed their insanity they're bonding.

third time is the charm... slaps knee. his hand flinches from his tongue, and it burns a great deal from how raw the center is. it was a clean cut after all, but he doesn't pull his hand away, instead he allows him to continue. )

Ah... now you'll get sick because of me, there was better hope to drink from...

[ Komaeda's going to die bc he got Rokkun germs in his hand wound, maybe this was the master plan all along.

Blood is gross, though, and he at least does make a bit of a face when he leans back away from Komaeda. I keep having to click thread from start to see what thread I'm even tagging and I can't believe this is the one where Rokkun says he's busy bc he's got plans to murder people or something outside so he can't play with Komaeda and then he does this. ]

I won't get sick. Come here, I think I have some tissues in my locker.

[ Crumpled tissues. But he's sure Komaeda can find a clean spot to use. ]

Ah... Ah... Ah...

( he chides him, shaking his head as he places his hand back in place, it seems like he's not done with what he was doing. if rokkun is going to drink his blood, he should do it properly, and not let one drop go to waste. it hurts to move his hand, but he's digging a finger down against his palm to stir up the flow again, causing a bit of blood to seep through the cut. )

Even trash like me has enough blood to feed you properly.

( for someone so bloodthirsty. anyway, what happened to the comment about making him sick, or maybe komaeda doesn't care anymore. he still has the switchblade in his other hand, and while he's in the mindset to make things worse, instead, he slips it into his pants pocket as he leans forward towards rokkun to be overbearing and force him to drink. yeah, he's a freak. are they on the floor? because i was going to push rokkun onto his back, but i can't remember, i'm tearing up. tell me what they're doing. )

[ when did they end up on the floor????????????? what's going on, i don't know what they're doing

Rokkun's just on his back drinking Komaeda's blood like a freak, I don't know, nobody look at this thread ]

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