npc contact.1
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( he sighs, but he'll get up from where he stands as he walks over. )
I came here because I believed in the strength of both participant's hope. What's the point of arguing when together, a type of happiness could be made...
( don't get depressed komaeda, don't get depressed — yeah, fake it until you make it. )
...Now I feel like an idiot for trying, I should just kill myself... that was the agreement, wasn't it Stephanie?
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You agreed to that?
[ Hello? he sure is addressing Stephanie now. ]
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[so you'd think she'd be like "I never promised that you could kill yourself" but]
I said I'd forgive him and let him join my club, and both of those things happened! It's just that they stopped happening, because he's a jerk! That's his fault, not mine!
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( he lifts his hand, patting stephanie's head in order to calm her down... )
Rokkun, I'm sure we can do a trade for the knowledge on the fence... you're aware of how to turn it off, I want to test the hopes of the people here...
( he kneels down, crawling towards the edge of the pool, but not enough to fall in. the fence would be able to help stephanie's club, and that means her hope with others will be able to expand... he's interested. )
You'll help me ( us... ), won't you?
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Offering to let me join your club isn't very convincing when I can't run anymore, or play or move how I want.
[ All he can do is dead man's float in the pool. He should feel resentment at the offer that he would obviously have to turn down, and Stephanie would be happy because he's not there and she gets to keep her side of whatever promise they made. ]
Why not hold your club on the field? It's larger than the courts, without all the fencing in the way, and the turf is easier on the knees.
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You know why! That track is even worse than the fence! At least the fence has a gate!
[looks at Komaeda] See? This is what he was doing last time. Acting like he doesn't already know all of this, because he's a jerk.
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( he laughs softly, crossing his arms on his knees as he looks out into the pool. he scans the area, before looking back to stephanie. )
It's because we're leaving him room for suggestions, it's... our fault. ( wouldn't call this him being difficult, he just wants certain incentives, and probably a bit of mind games. they know that he knows something, and then... )
There has to be special occasions to turn off the fence, you can tell us that, can't you?
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The special occasion is when you want to play tennis without electrocuting yourself to death, and you find a generous senpai to turn it off for you. I'll consider it after I'm able to run again.
[ Because, look. If he can't play, what does he get out of it? nothing ]
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[being kind. or was it kindness? for all he worships his ultimates, she's never seen him treat them with... acquiescence. excusing flaws instead of harping on them. working to make his wording clearer, rather than trying to twist them more.
she grips his shoulder. she can't stop whatever actions he'll take when she speaks. and she can't stop that. she couldn't stop that if she wanted to.]
Is this how you always talk to him? The way he was acting, I thought you were at least nice to him.
[and she doesn't.]
If this is how you treat people that care about you, your family is better off without you.
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or so he thought, and not expecting stephanie to speak to him which he smiles, a hand raised to brush it off. )
I should have anticipated this, actually.
( he wants to say more, until stephanie continues, and komaeda's eyes widen for a brief moment before returning to a normal size. a sensitive subject, and he raises a hand to his shoulder where hers reside, and he squeezes to gain her attention. )
...
( his mouth parts, he wants to say what the narration for any of this is, but then sara's question comes to mind. miss blue and mr. red, two hopeful individuals with their own requests and actions that differ from one another, and who would he protect. lips close, and he glances at the water in front of him because his answer to that question was to let the hope of the two individuals speak, and it applies here too. no matter the description of their relationship, they can push past this. )
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he turns around in the water to swim to the other side of the pool, so he can get out there. ]
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Coward.
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Trash like me getting involved in people's lives... why do I try, and neither party feels very hopeful now...
( depressing, he comments to himself as he stands up properly.
well.
rokkun: 0
stephanie: 2
time to pack it up, he'll direct his attention to stephanie. )
I know it's hard to understand, but he wants to be needed... Next time, we'll work on the hope you two share. ( c: )
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[she puts the other arm over his shoulders, putting her head against his back.]
And I didn't like the way he spoke to you. If I see him do it again, I'll... beat him up, or something. You deserve better.
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( he blinks slightly confused, smiling softly as he cants his head to the side. he's not bothered by her actions, and his hand lifts to pat her head. )
He sounded pretty excited to hear from us, actually! If he didn't, he wouldn't have given us the clues that he did.. I'll thank him for us when he's not fleeing, it'd do no good right now...
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... Saying what I said 'cause I was upset about you doesn't make what I said any nicer though, does it? [a sigh] And I don't feel bad about it at all, this time. Maybe I'm not very nice anymore.
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( a purgatory of sorts if he had to explain it, a goal set for all of them, and if they're able to pass the benchmark... then...
no need to worry stephanie over it. )
That's for another day, though. Today, you are still kind... because you were capable of forgiving even when against it. You find yourself cruel, but to me... you are kind even now. This is why it's hard to discern what is right and wrong when questioning other people's morals...
( that said, it's why he can say both side were selfish, but wrong? that's a whole different can of worms. )
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[it probably can't. for several reasons.]
... Komaeda, am I dead? I don't feel dead, but I don't think I know any better. If the scars on our arms are supposed to show lives that were taken... I've only ever had the one.
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( now he thought he said that conversation was for another day. )
Is it impossible to be dead, if you don't know you're dead... how can you say you're alive?
( it might sound like crazy logic, because it is, but when they think about it... )
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( this sort of information is sensitive, and yet, he doesn't know if telling her will help or break her more. from the questions she gives him now, he smiles softly, and laughs. )
Don't think about it too much, you're what you believe yourself to be. ( ... ) You're alive, Stephanie, we all are.
( here in yogen anyway, and then they're capable of dying. he turns the dial though, acting on his own accord to throw off the conversation: )
I can stab myself if you want to see a death to check whether you're alive or not!
( and he opts out for her sanity, to keep her hope strong. )
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... I mean it, you know. You do deserve better. [pause] And you're gonna get it, if I have anything to say about it.
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( not her leaning, and he's going to try not to fall over on purpose... it's tempting. )
You shouldn't say things like that, I'll end up disappointing you again... In a couple of days, I want to have this conversation again.
( ... ) So I want you to continue being you until then, alright?
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[beat] Are you gonna talk to me like I'm a silly kid, or is a couple of days enough to get that out of your system?
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( is that the insanity or what... god only knows. )
But in a few days... I doubt Rokkun wants us to stay around his pool...
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