adsum | npc contact.1

[ His face goes carefully blank, that's what it does. Komaeda trusts his hope, not his person. As for Rokkun, he trusts Komaeda's... maybe it's "hope" in a sense too. ]

Okay
But not on paper. After class

[ No physical proof, just him and Komaeda's dementia. ]

( hope is everything to komaeda, it's like a full blown person — when he looks at rokkun, his hope is something to admire. )

after class... every day?

( he questions, puppy dog eyes and everything to try and get in his good graces. you know, komaeda's an attention whore so he's trying it. while he waits for rokkun to reply back, he uses his foot to kick against the back of his tendon — footsies!! — while he jots down more notes for his... third-year class. fix him on the roster teach, komaeda is here to stay! )

[ Talking about his thoughts and feelings every single day after class sounds exhausting to the bones. He can't even turn it around and ask if Komaeda would share his thoughts, because he already does that, he never shuts up about hope, and in that way he's a lot more open about his beliefs than Rokkun would ever be.

Stupid.

He presses his leg up against Komaeda's. It's not like he has to spill his heart the first day. ]

Every day I don't have soccer practice
On those days, walk me out the door

( he wasn't expecting rokkun to even spill his heart, or even talk about himself, maybe komaeda's too used to doing things for a goal that it's integrated in his way of living. use or be used, it's kind of unfortunate, but maybe he'll learn to see things a little differently. or well try to, he's giving in to these foreign memories for rokkun, and probably the only one he'll accept them for. will he reject everyone else's thoughts on him from the past? he sure will. )

i see...
i didn't expect that

( he also didn't expect him to even want to be "partners," or whatever that entails. he lifts his head, staring at the chalkboard to see if there's anything new. better to kill time with a few questions. )

let's play 21 questions

[ There's a new example on the board, a diagram of a beam of light refracted and reflected, ending up smaller and upside down compared to the original. ]

1. Why didn't you expect it?

[ Answer his question, and Komaeda can ask the next one. This is how the game works. ]

because you're inviting me to come to your class to make it happen
trash like me? yeah, it's definitely something i wouldn't have expected
when there's other better people to choose from

( that's also the truth, komaeda isn't one to lie when he makes his intentions clear, everything else comes down to... walk him out the door? what can he even do or say between that time? maybe this is rokkun's chance to kill him.

... now komaeda's wondering if he goes one or two. )

1. the first time you called us "partners in crime," you seemed hesitant. what things did we do together?

( treason? attempted murder? vandalism? terrorism? emotional abuse? destruction? war crimes? you know, the works? )

[ He looks over at Komaeda like ?? ??? bc meeting up after class isn't inviting him to class— not like this, sitting together and unable to pay attention to the lecture and having to rely on Komaeda's notes later. ]

Better people know better than to be with me
Crime
3. Does a past you don't remember matter?

( it's inviting him, accept him as a third-year, rokkun! which, he'll just come anyway especially if the teacher doesn't notice... he's a good boy, writing down their notes so they can pass their next exams.

when he looks back over at what's written, he thinks about the struggle that hinata himself endures, not knowing anything, and how komaeda finds this karma that the same is happening to him. something like this would happen to him, and he guesses that's what he gets for being "lucky". forget the past and the future will hold something better for him, he doesn't know what it is just yet, but he's holding out — maybe it's rokkun's hope, maybe that's what he gave the past up for. )

i'm not going to remember anything one day
you of all people know this, but if it was avoidable, i'd like to know.
4. what memories do you want me to remember

[ Rokkun accepts so damn much but that doesn't change the school roster. ]

Every dies and everybody forgets. But I'm talking about right now
I want you to remember our original promise. It'd be meaningless if I told you
5. What memories do you want to remember?

( give komaeda a few weeks, he's going to have them rosters edited, he's going to be a third-year, and walk rokkun to the door. second-year if he tries hard enough, then he's closer to the third-year floor. )

before you said you'd break it if you died before me.
it makes me wonder if our original promise was to die together
6. how we met

( morbid, sure, but komaeda doesn't seem like he's joking either. )

[ ... ]

You found me
7. Why does it matter?

you can learn a lot about a person through how you meet them
and other's say it's special, i wondered if we were the same, special
8. if i told you about the memories i do remember, would you call them fake?

( wait, let him flip a page in their book so they look like they're paying attention. )

[ He glances up at the board and the teacher is talking about camera lenses and oh boy he's going to have to self study tonight. Komaeda being in his class is detrimental to graduation, actually. ]

No
9. What memories do you remember?

( don't blame his focus on komaeda, to be honest, get him a phone so he can help rokkun study?

what memories do he remember? none that involve rokkun, only things people find depressing, things that komaeda is detached from — no family, no friends, just himself and terrible circumstances that brought about good ones. )

i had a dog that i'd see every day as i came home
i almost got to see him again once

( he's sure rokkun might understand from how he phrased his words. the dog he speaks about is long gone, the chance to see him again was when owari choked him where he laid. unlucky and lucky occurrences. )

10. what memories do you remember?

[ how does a phone help ]

A younger brother and sister
Living by the coast
The home that I grew up in
You
11. Why not me?

( so they can text through the night, staying up discussing notes.

if this is memories they're on, this might take a bit. )

my father and mother are dead
my dog is dead
i have no relatives
i only have me
and money
hope
that's pretty lucky
i want you

( the base of his childhood that basically left him with no one, but in a way, rokkun does deserve a fte since he gifted komaeda once... )

[ "I have no family but I have money and hope! Lucky!" stares at the sky

He doesn't even follow up with a question... Well, Rokkun can provide an answer all the same ]

Yes
13. Should I start over?

[ me googling fte "An FTE is the hours worked by one employee on a full-time basis. The concept is used to convert the hours worked by several part-time employees into the hours worked by full-time employees." and going ??? and then i went oh ]

( promise you he doesn't even want the money, he only wants hope... but he's lucky!

STOPP NOT ME LAUGHING PLEASEEE maybe that's what his special free time event should be turned into. )

yeah
go back to 1
i don't want to stop talking to you

( he knows what rokkun meant, but he's also trying to be cute?? is this how you be cute??? komaeda's trying. )

for your question
i want to remember what it is that i missed, starting over is one, but my memory...
14. am i really that unlucky that i can't understand what we shared in the past?

( go back to 1! )

[ adsflkhj bonding over accounting... cursed ]

No
Maybe it's better this way. But starting over feels like giving up, when my hope is that you'll remember

[ It's a lost cause, though, with Komaeda's dementia. But maybe that's why he's so persistent, when he was resistant to Rika's initial advances, because being with Komaeda is impossible and his affections won't be returned. In a way, there's safety in impossibility. ]

1. If you could remember everything, would you really want to?

i'd never advise giving up on your hope, it just wouldn't be me.
you'll have to live with me and my faults

( to be punished for his illness, he didn't think rokkun was that sort of person — perhaps this was a mistake at the start. komaeda's visibly sick, the other would have known if they've been together since childhood, though komaeda's diagnosis came around in his teen years, but still... who knows, maybe it's a different story than what rokkun knows. )

i can't deny what i don't know. so yes
2. did we apply to this school together?

[ How dare Komaeda have dementia ]

No
I enrolled first, and met you after
3. Would you have applied, knowing what you do now?

( why does he get to forget his memories while everyone else keeps them... :/ )

?

( what he does now... you mean... not solve mysteries? )

4. in full detail... what do i do now?

[ ...

That's a good question ]

?
5. What do you do now?

i help people's hope, isn't that obvious?
6. what do you do now?

( let him flip a page in their handy, dandy schoolbook. )

[ He stares at the blank page for a moment, then looks up at the board and tries to memorize an equation before looking back down.

What does he do? Nothing as grand as """helping hope""" ]

I am collecting
7. Are you happy?

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